Today

Lesson learned today?

Use lighter fluid to remove that adhesive-residue-bullshit that stickers leave on stuff you buy.

Just don't smoke or something while you do it.

And just so I can say there's a picture in this post:

Fucking Salt.

You know when you go out to dinner at a place that isn't nice enough to have cloth napkins, but still have waiters and waitresses?

yeah, those fucking places.

You know how they don't have any cheap ass coasters, they just have a small fucking napkin to put under your drink to keep the water ring from doing abso-fucking-lutely nothing to their table cloth?

I hate when the cup sticks to that shit because of the condensation that gathers on the bottom.

You know how to fix that?

sprinkle some salt on that goddamn napkin - then proceed to throw it in your server's eyes.

Then your cup won't bring it's new best friend, the soggy-ass napkin with it every time you pick it up off the god damn table.

Duckception

They should totally make a movie based on this premise!!!!!

... Oh, wait.  They did.